To be happy we usually use our body, mind, emotions, senses and energy to do the following:
1) Search for happiness in a world of forms. And get the objects, relationships or activities that give us happiness.
2) Resist or avoid anything (any form) that comes in the way of happiness.
We experience happiness, but it doesn’t last. Sooner or later the form that gave us happiness reduces or disappears. And our pursuit for such forms continues.
Is it possible to break out of this cycle and experience lasting happiness?
Yes.
Experience the essence. Of who you are. The source from which your mind, emotions, senses etc. have arisen. Connect to your core. You will experience happiness every moment.
How do you find out what is your core? How do you connect to it? Stay tuned.
Inner work is about placing your awareness within yourself. It helps you stay connected to the different parts of your body/being and its consciousness. It helps you connect to the core of who you are. It helps you stay in your natural home.
Stay in this home as you go about your life interacting with the world outside. It will help you stay centered. The more you can do this, the more you will act with clarity, strength and calmness. The more you come from this “inner work – life balance” every moment, the more you will experience joy.
Giving leads to a shift in the being of both the giver and the receiver.
You can give in many ways. Out of obligation. Out of sympathy. In exchange for something. We typically expect something in return; at least the recipient to be grateful.
What can you give? When should you give? What can you expect in return?
Here is some wisdom from across the ages:
What can I give?
“What you are, give that;
what you have, give that,
and your gift will be perfect …
it is not by the quantity or the quality that it is measured:
it is by the sincerity of the giving and the absoluteness of the giving.”
– The Mother
“dātavyam iti yad dānaṁ dīyate ‘nupakāriṇe
deśhe kāle cha pātre cha tad dānaṁ sāttvikaṁ smṛitam”
Charity given to a worthy person simply because it is right to give, without consideration of anything in return, at the proper time and in the proper place, is stated to be in the mode of goodness.”
– Bhagavad Gita, Chapter 17, Verse 20
What if I am unable to give money or any material thing?
“You give but little when you give of your possessions.
It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.
For what are your possessions
but things you keep and guard for fear you may need them tomorrow?
And tomorrow, what shall tomorrow bring
to the overprudent dog burying bones in the trackless sand
as he follows the pilgrims to the holy city?
And what is fear of need but need itself?
Is not dread of thirst
when your well is full, the thirst that is unquenchable?”
– Kahlil Gibran
When should I give?
“It is well to give when asked,
but it is better to give unasked,
through understanding;
And to the open-handed
the search for one who shall receive
is joy greater than giving.
And is there aught you would withhold?
All you have shall some day be given;
Therefore give now,
that the season of giving may be yours
and not your inheritors’.
– Kahlil Gibran
Who should I give to?
“You often say,
I would give, but only to the deserving.
The trees in your orchard say not so,
nor the flocks in your pasture.
They give that they may live,
for to withhold is to perish.
Surely he who is worthy to receive his days and his nights,
is worthy of all else from you.
And he who has deserved to drink from the ocean of life
deserves to fill his cup from your little stream.
And what desert greater shall there be,
than that which lies in the courage and the confidence,
nay the charity, of receiving?
– Kahlil Gibran
What do I get by giving?
“There are those who give little of the much which they have
and they give it for recognition
and their hidden desire makes their gifts unwholesome.
And there are those who have little and give it all.
These are the believers in life and the bounty of life,
and their coffer is never empty.
There are those who give with joy,
and that joy is their reward.
And who are you that men should rend their bosom and unveil their pride,
that you may see their worth naked and their pride unabashed?
“The path doesn’t save all its pleasure for the end. You can enjoy it now.” – Thanissaro Bhikku
If you try to find joy only in the result, you get robbed of the countless moments of joy that are possible along the way. You may think of the time spent on the path as something that has to be endured or suffered to reach that outcome.
The joy is in the effort.
“It is the effort which gives joy; a human being who does not know how to make an effort will never find joy. Those who are essentially lazy will never find joy — they do not have the strength to be joyful! It is effort which gives joy. Effort makes the being vibrate at a certain degree of tension which makes it possible for you to feel the joy.
It is only effort, in whatever domain it be – material effort, moral effort, intellectual effort – which creates in the being certain vibrations which enable you to get connected with universal vibrations; and it is this which gives joy. It is effort which pulls you out of inertia; it is effort which makes you receptive to the universal forces.” – The Mother
According to Thich Nhat Hanh, even a chore like dish washing can be joyful and therapeutic.
“Washing the dishes is at the same time a means and an end – that is, not only do we do the dishes in order to have clean dishes, we also do the dishes just to do the dishes and live fully each moment while washing them.” – Thich Nhat Hanh
“I have known such people, who were capable of making the necessary effort (not a prudent and calculated effort but a spontaneous one) in no matter what field: material, vital, intellectual, etc., and in this effort there was always joy. For example, a man sits down to write a book, he makes an effort which sets vibrating something in his brain to attract ideas; well, suddenly, this man experiences joy. It is quite certain that, whatever you do, even the most material work, like sweeping a room or cooking, if you make the necessary effort to do this work to the maximum of your ability, you will feel joy, even if what you do is against your nature. When you want to realize something, you make quite spontaneously the necessary effort; this concentrates your energies on the thing to be realized and that gives a meaning to your life. This compels you to a sort of organisation of yourself, a sort of concentration of your energies, because it is this that you wish to do and not fifty other things which contradict it. And it is in this concentration, this intensity of the will, that lies the origin of joy. This gives you the power to receive energies in exchange for those you spend.” – The Mother
So, what appeals to you more? The pursuit of something or the achievement of the end result? What are some ways you can find joy along the way?
Have you ever had moments in your life where doing something gave you a lot of calm joy? Where the sense of space and time seemed to disappear? And you seemed to be your most authentic self?
Welcome to being in the zone!
Is it possible for me to access this state very often?
To answer this, we must understand what makes us be in the zone in the first place.
“We are made up of different parts which have to be unified around the psychic being, if we are conscious of it, or at least around the central aspiration. If this unification is not done, we carry this division within us. To do this, each thought, each feeling, each sensation, each impulse, each reaction, as it manifests, must be presented in the consciousness to the central being or its aspiration. What is in accord is accepted; what is not in accord is refused, rejected or transformed. It is a long endeavor and may take years – but once it is done, the unification is achieved and the path becomes easy and swift.” – The Mother
Within us, there seem to be many forces seemingly at conflict and what we do, say, think, feel, sense etc. often seem disparate as though coming from multiple personalities within us. But behind all that we do in our life, there seems to be a central aspiration coming from deep within, from what can be termed as our core. This core is our natural state of being or our inmost presence.
Whenever we connect to this core, to the aspiration or essence that is trying to emerge, we are filled with life. Different aspects of our life get harmonized and our life becomes much more enjoyable. It seems as though we have got a direction to our life, the purpose of our existence. We are in the zone whenever we are able to do this.
Try to articulate your core, your aspiration. You can write it using words, draw it or express it in any other way that you feel comfortable with.
How to I get back if I fall out of the zone?
Firstly, you have to recognize that you have fallen out of the zone. This can be done, for example, by accessing the feelings when you go off-balance. Some people may immediately notice the lack of joy or the lack of connection. Some people may feel uneasy. Use this as the signal to find out you are moving out of your zone.
Once you spot the signal, learn to get back in. Invoke and connect to the central aspiration directly or to your articulation of the same in forms that you are comfortable with. You could do this as many number of times as possible during the day so that you continue to be in the zone!